Devastated doesn't even begin to cover what I am feeling right now. S had an SA today because we were going to try and get some sperm to freeze for our IVF cycle since his count and motility were so low. Not too long ago I got that call that there were no sperm whatsoever in the sample.
I haven't told S yet, he's at work and I don't want him preoccupied with it so I will tell him when he gets home. He is going to be heartbroken. He has been trying so hard to improve things, he has changed his diet, had been drinking more water, has completely cut out caffeine, has been taking cool showers, has been taking vitamins. I hate that I have to tell him this news.
I just don't even understand how/why this happened? He has had two other SAs and the second one, while still extremely low, had improved from the first.
We have to wait until Monday to figure out our plan because our RE is out of town, but as far as I know the next option is surgery for S to try and extract sperm that way. I hate that he has to go through that. And I am terrified now that won't work either. We have started talking about donor sperm lately again, and S says he will be okay if that is what we have to do. I just hate that my husband might not be able to have a biological child. He is the most amazing man and I just hate this for him.
I feel so lost and hopeless right now :(
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